{"id":8,"date":"2008-05-30T05:06:33","date_gmt":"2008-05-30T05:06:33","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.allydirectory.com\/jokes\/?p=8"},"modified":"2009-11-11T08:42:20","modified_gmt":"2009-11-11T08:42:20","slug":"what-husbands-need-to-know","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.allydirectory.com\/FunnyJokes\/what-husbands-need-to-know\/","title":{"rendered":"What Husbands Need To Know?"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span lang=\"en-us\"><span style=\"font-size: x-small;\"> A woman was walking down the street. Without warning, she was  \t\t\taccosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless woman  \t\t\twho asked her for a couple of dollars for dinner.<\/p>\n<p>The woman took out her bill fold, extracted ten dollars and asked,  \t\t\t&#8220;If I give you this money, will you buy some wine with it instead of  \t\t\tdinner?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;No, I had to stop drinking years ago&#8221; the homeless woman replied.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Will you use it to go shopping instead of buying food?&#8221; the woman  \t\t\tasked.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;No, I don&#8217;t waste time shopping, the homeless woman said. &#8220;I need  \t\t\tto spend all my time trying to stay alive.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Will you spend this on a beauty salon instead of food?&#8221; the woman  \t\t\tasked.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Are you NUTS!&#8221; replied the homeless woman. &#8220;I haven&#8217;t had my hair  \t\t\tdone In 20 years!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Well,&#8221; said the woman, &#8220;I&#8217;m not going to give you the money.  \t\t\tInstead, I&#8217;m going to take you out for dinner with my hubby and  \t\t\tmyself tonight.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>The homeless woman was astounded. &#8220;Won&#8217;t your husband be furious  \t\t\twith you for doing that? I know I&#8217;m dirty, and I probably smell  \t\t\tpretty disgusting.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>The woman replied, &#8220;That&#8217;s okay. It&#8217;s important for him to see what  \t\t\ta woman looks like after she has given up shopping, hair  \t\t\tappointments, and wine.&#8221;<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>A woman was walking down the street. Without warning, she was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless woman who asked her for a couple of dollars for dinner. The woman took out her bill fold, extracted ten dollars and asked, &#8220;If I give you this money, will you buy some wine with it [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_mi_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0},"categories":[3],"tags":[4,18,5,19],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.allydirectory.com\/FunnyJokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.allydirectory.com\/FunnyJokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.allydirectory.com\/FunnyJokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.allydirectory.com\/FunnyJokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.allydirectory.com\/FunnyJokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=8"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.allydirectory.com\/FunnyJokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.allydirectory.com\/FunnyJokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=8"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.allydirectory.com\/FunnyJokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=8"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.allydirectory.com\/FunnyJokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=8"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}